To vanish into oblivion is easy to do.

Sometimes I think I can feel myself disappearing.
I know some people don't like to think about the fact that every moment that passes is another they can't get back, that they're a moment closer to their own demise, but sometimes I think I can feel it.
I can feel myself winding down and getting to that place where people don't think of you every day anymore, where not one person does.
Nobody calls me.
No one sends me a message, an e-mail, or a letter.
I don't see anybody, no one sees me.
I don't hear anybody.
Nobody hears me.

I'm alone most of the time and it's starting to wear me down.
I don't feel like sleeping until I do, and then I don't feel like getting up.
I don't have an appetite.
It was 3pm before I had anything to eat today and even then I didn't feel hungry.
I never have a reason to go anywhere, but when a reason comes up, I don't want to go out.

The things that I love and the people who don't love me back don't seem enough to sustain me anymore.
I think about people all day long and nobody thinks about me and I've reached a point where I don't want to think about them either.
Deep down in the pit of my stomach I feel myself dying and I wish I'd do it faster.

I have a job interview tomorrow and I'm hoping for a chance to do something...anything that would get me out of the house.
But at the end of the day nobody cares about me and even though I've tried to deny that it was important for years, I wish somebody did, just one person.
Because I'm in a lot of pain all the time and the more it hurts to smile, the more I think it's not going to go away.
I'm too good at wanting, but I'm never gonna be what I want and I'm never gonna be the thing someone else wants.
I wish I had the guts not to be anymore.